‘Monuments to nothingness of identity politics’

Editorial in The Indian Express:

“Eighteen years after it was first installed, it looks like Bangalore might finally get to glimpse Tamil poet-saint Thiruvalluvar’s graven image. So much Tamil pride is bound up with the sainted Thiruvalluvar; and much Kannada pride hinges on countering Tamil grandiosity….

“Statues make powerful statements about their time and context. They can be abiding symbols of civic pride or relics of a long-ago past. The toppling of statues is the Kodak moment for historical change. The Karnataka-Tamil Nadu statue saga though is something else altogether. It is a monument to intransigent identity politics, the squabbles that can erupt out of apparent nothings and feed into a vast and pointless animus.”

Read the full article: Casting the first stone

Also read: Who said, ‘If fools claim they are right, agree’?

Has Section 377 been clamped all across State?*

SUNAAD RAGHURAM, holidaying in the Alps after the Tour de France, happily forwards a forward (source unknown, will be duly acknowledged):

The recent Delhi High Court ruling on homosexual sex between consulting consenting adults has created quite a stir in Karnataka and has made the average Kannadiga take a relook at his daily life.

The native Kannadiga family man wakes up in the morning (belaGAY) and discovers that his whole family could be, well, gay.

His father is heard telling his mother: maganGAY, magalGAY, soseGAY.

His wife says appanGAY, ammanGAY, gandanGAY, and that she loves malliGAY.

He gets ready for breakfast, thindyGAY, where the talk is about nanGay, ninGay .

His favorite home-made sweet dish is holiGay.

At work, they talk about: YaarGAY, AvaruGAY, IvaruGAY, hinGAY, hanGAY, elliGAY, alliGAY, bossGAY, secretaryGAY.

At his children’s school, it is teachersGAY, studentsGAY, puneGAY and so on.

For entertainment, he goes cinemaGAY.

The judiciary and police are no different. It is JudgeGAY, PoliceGAY, KalruGAY and so on.

Even the non-living things are GAY inclined. The Kannadiga says busGAY, trainGAY, flightGAY.

Finally, at the end of the day, he heads back home, maneGAY.

And what does he find on the way, the road is lined with sampiGAY trees.

Idu nimmellariGAY

Forward maadi yella KannadigariGAY!

* Please note this item is under the “naliGAY in cheek” category

Who said, ‘If fools claim they were right, agree’?

Aside from being the first BJP government below the Vindhyas, there has been nothing—zero, zilch, nada; sonne, poojayam, shoonya—to write home about the B.S. Yediyurappa government.

Although the words “governance” and “development” trip off the chief minister’s tongue at the sight of a mike, the only “change” that the people of the State have seen is a change of hands and heads steeped in scandal, sleaze, controversy, corruption, communalism, dissidence, not to speak of rank non-performance.

However, if there is one area in which “Yeddy” can even half-way claim credit, it is in breaking the shameful deadlock with his Tamil Nadu counterpart Muthuvel Karunanidhi over the installation of the statue of Sarvagna in Madras—for the reciprocal installation of a statue of Thiruvallur in Bangalore.

For nearly a decade, the busts of the great Kannada and Tamil poets lay hostage to the verbal and physical terrorism of the language chauvinists on both sides of the Cauvery, acting in the name of a life-giving, life-sustaining river. Thankfully, hopefully, that is now a thing of the past.

***

On Tuesday, Thiruvalluvar’s statue, which lay covered in the Tamil-dominated locality of Ulsoor, was first smoked out of its honey combs, and then removed and lowered, to make space for a new bronze structure statue waiting to be installed on August 9.

The BJP’s motive may be suspect—political analysts say the party is eyeing the Tamil vote in the Bangalore City Corporation elections—especially given Yediyurappa’s despicable attempt to ratchet up the Hongenakal row, but even so, few will grudge the sight of the two States acting in sync, for once, as two civilised States should.

Photographs: Karnataka Photo News

Also read: CHURUMURI POLL: Who is right on Hogenakal?

How does a TV/film blackout help the Hogenakal row?

What happens if and when a dam of milk explodes

Many moons ago, Sharad Pawar, then chief minister of Maharashtra, came to the Lalitha Mahal Palace hotel in Mysore for a summit with the chief ministers of the southern States. Stepping out, he grandly told the assembled reporters that agreement had been reached on the Dudh Sagar issue.

The reporters, of course, knew nothing of Dudh Sagar, although one of them bravely ventured to guess that it must be “some milk project” involving Karnataka and Maharashtra. The Dudh Sagar is some milk project, except that it is the milk of water.

Yesterday, this is how it looked when the milk majestically gushed into the State from India’s fifth tallest water falls.

Photograph: Karnataka Photo News

Where the soil, air & peda help the vocal chords

Sunanda Mehta pays an excellent tribute to Dharwad, the meeting point and melting pot of Hindustani and Carnatic music, in The Indian Express:

“Madhav Gudi, 66, is a senior disciple of Pandit Bhimsen Joshi. Sitting on the chatai in his small home tucked away in a bylane in Dharwad, he dwells on his rich hoard of memories.

“‘I first heard my guru in Kundgol at Sawai Gandharva‘s house where he sang from 10 pm to 4 am. I was nine then. Mesmerised, I followed Panditji to Pune where finally he consented to take me on as his disciple, provided I finished my matriculation. I did that and stayed at his house for six years and learnt from him,’ says Gudi.

“He fondly remembers the times Pandit Bhimsen would drive down from Pune to his house at Dharwad at midnight, ask him to open a spare room on top and tell him to sing from night to morning, long after the shishya had emerged as an artist of calibre himself.

“The guru-shishya relationship is, in fact, almost a way of life at Dharwad. ‘People here feel their child should know music. Music tuitions are taken almost as seriously as other school subjects,’ says Vasant Karnad, violinist, music critic and actor Girish Karnad‘s brother, who along with his wife Sunanda, now lives in Dharwad after spending 40-odd years of his working life in Mumbai.

“‘People here have a music sense. Concerts go house full. In Kannada we call it manninaguna—that is it’s in the soil. Now the tree cover is not even 25 per cent of what existed at one time. In fact if you went at a height you could only see trees, no Dharwad. Maybe that oxygen level was good for vocal chords development. Who knows?’ says Karnad.”

Read the full article: Notes from Dharwad

Also read: From Dharwad, India’s best shehnai player today

Only for those who follow Dharwad Kannada

Dabbudabbudabbu dot Dasara in Bellary dotcom

E.R. RAMACHANDRAN writes: With Dasara festivities only a few months away, furious preparations are underway at various levels.

Who’s thinking what?

***

Chief Minister (while addressing the Dasara celebration committee): “I want this year’s Dasara to be the grandest ever. If you want money for anything—anything—as long as it has something to do with Dasara, you have only to ask me.”

CM (to himself):  “I must get Advaniji to open the Dasara at Chamundi Hills come what may. That way Ananth‘s plan to get Raj Nath Singhji will be nipped in the bud? I hope the President doesn’t accept Shobha‘s invite, or the Ambani Brothers, the Reddy Brothers’ invite.”

***

Reddy brothers: “Abbayi! Yentha hungama idi! How much will it cost to get Chamundi Hills here, fly the elephants and organize the 10-day stuff including torchlight parade? Let’s throw a challenge and do Dasara in Bellary. And we must set up a website: dabbudabbudabbu dot mysoredasara in bellary dot com with a Twitterulu and Facebook accountulu.”

***

Meanwhile at the Dubare elephant camp:

Mahout leader: “If the government does not cough up more TA/ DA,  I will make sure there’s no Jamboo Savari this year. I will say Balarama has broken his leg. We will not be fooled again by the DC and district minister having khara baath, rava kesari and jamoon for breakfast with us in front of TV and newspaper wallahs.”

Balarama: “Gajapayana, my foot! There’s no way I am going to walk all the way and trek back once again. I would like to be picked up, along with my girlfriends at the camp and dropped back, sort of door–to-door service. We should also have some majaa like the others. Otherwise let them manage with elephant cutouts from Rangayana!”

***

At the City and district offices:

Contractor: “Only Rs 2 crore for tarring the roads? I just did that stretch last month. Luckily the rains, though late, have washed off all the tar. I must ask for more money as the number of heads to share has increased. Otherwise I have to do a ‘remix’ with more sand and less cement!”

Mayor: “Dasara is almost upon us and hope it goes well this year. But what’s the guarantee? Will I even get an invitation? Will they give me enough time to put on my robe before hauling me up the crane to garland Balarama? Most important, will I get a chair to sit in Bannimantap?”

Corporation Commissioner: If the phata-phat JNNURM subway doesn’t come up after so many months, I will become naram. Hope the pourakarmacharis don’t strike work on those 10 days!”

Hotel: “Doubling the room rates is not enough to make up for bleak business for the rest of the year. Also the touts sweeping the railway station and bus stand for customers are asking for more commission. If we cannot increase room tariff, must ‘adjust’ in lunch and dinner with holillada sambhar and neeru saaru.”

Autorickshaw driver: “We have to do something with our meters; must get them ‘refixed’ again at the rate of at least 1: 1.5.  Duplicate petrol rates have also increased. Must get association to do a directory of the main duplicate petrol depots in the City so that we don’t have to burn a hole in our pockets filling the real thing.”

Sub-Committee Member: After spilling lot of blood, sweat, tears and you-know-what, I have become a sub- committee member. If I don’t get a sizeable mamool, it will all be a huge waste and Dasara will be a dead loss for me.”

Police Commissioner: “I can make sure Dasara is trouble free despite communal and terror fears. But how will I control the ministers’ families, aunts and nieces, nephews and grand nephews, first and nth cousins with their dogs and goats. I am already getting nightmares in the mornings already.”

Deputy commissioner: “There are a zillion and one things to do and only 24 hours in my organiser. I also have to keep my bags packed each day as I may be asked to move and report at Bidar, Bookana Kere or wherever.”

***

Meanwhile…

The general public: “With thogari bele and hesaru bele prices hitting the roof and aloo gedde becoming something like gold to be sold only in C. Krishnaiah Chetty & Sons and Bhima Jewellers, what shall we eat? How can we fill our stomachs listening to Sonu Nigam, Kunal Ganjawala, Guru Kiran or dancing with Vasundara Doreswami and singing with Vasundara Das…?

This Jaggesh does what that Jaggesh doesn’t do

With Independence Day a fortnight away, Jaggesh from Davanagere goes around Cubbon Park selling the national flag, badges and other tricoloured knick-knacks in Bangalore on Saturday.

Photograph: Karnataka Photo News

And five Kannadigas are Kannada activists?!*^

Nearly three years ago, Bombay-based film-maker M. GONZOLA had posted this “weekend item” on churumuri, a chain-mail really that had been doing the round for months.

One Tam-Brahm = priest at the Vardarajaperumal temple.
Two Tam-Brahms = maths tuition class.
Three Tam-Brahms = queue outside the U.S consulate at 4 am.
Four Tam-Brahms = Thyagaraja music festival in Santa Clara.

And so on for Bengalis, Malayalees, Biharis, Punjabis, Bhaiyyas, Gujjus, Telugus, Marwaris, and the rest of the human species the world kindly calls “Indians”.

“Notice Kannadigas are missing from the list,” was Gonzola’s parting shot, inviting howls of protests from readers who decried the parochialism, the stereotyping, the “dumbing down”.

Wanderlust joins the debate with Gonzola and offers this suggestion for his her brethren and sistern:

One Kannadiga = Udupi Hotel in Singapore/ Seoul/ San Francisco
Two Kannadigas = Father-son political party
Three Kannadigas = Campus placements at Infy, scheduled to go to the US soon.
Four Kannadigas = Entire Kannada-speaking population of Koramangala and Indiranagar.

Also read: One, two, three, four Kannadigas equals…?

* For those who can’t take this, please note this post is marked under the “Naalige in Kenne” category

^ Repeat: this post is marked under the “Naalige in Kenne” category