The minister of state for external affairs, “Row Bahadur” Shashi Tharoor, often uses the Princess Diana analogy to explain globalisation to the great unwashed:
An English princess with a Welsh title leaves a French hotel with her Egyptian companion, who has supplanted a Pakistani; she is driven in a German car with a Dutch engine by a Belgian chauffeur full of Scottish whisky; they are chased by Italian paparazzi on Japanese motorcycles into a Swiss-built tunnel and crash; a rescue is attempted by an American doctor using Brazilian medicines, and the story is now being told to you now by an Indian visiting Berlin. There’s globalisation.
On the day the effluent discharge about the Cochin franchise in the IPL reached the upper reaches of stratosphere, here’s how “Tweetiya No. 1″ could describe Globalisation 2.0 using Dame Sunanda Pushkar:
“A Kashmiri beautician who migrated to Jammu marries a Delhi man, divorces him and goes to Dubai; she runs a spa there and marries a Kerala man who dies in a road accident in Delhi, after which she moves to Toronto. Now in advertising, now in construction, now in IT, now also in travel business, now also in automobiles, she divides her time with Mumbai, and makes friends with a electrical appliances company based in Gujarat and a diamond jewellery company with offices in Antwerp.
“Introduced in society gatherings by a London-born, Calcutta-schooled, American-educated United Nations executive assistant—with twin sons in Hong Kong and London—who had a column in a Madras newspaper and trusted a godman in Puttaparti before he was elected from Trivandrum, as a “friend from Canada”, the girl from Sopore magically lands a free 18% stake worth between Rs 70 crore and Rs 100 crore in the Cochin franchise of the Indian Premier League run by a Marwadi hailing from Uttar Pradesh who is deputy chief of the Punjab cricket association. The deal is signed in Bangalore. There’s globalization.”
* Tongue in cheek
Photograph: courtesy The Indian Express
Also read: Shashi Tharoor on globalisation
Shashi Tharoor on saving the saree
CHURUMURI POLL: Will Shashi Tharoor survive?
Tags: Churumuri, DNA, Indian Premier League, IPL, Lalit Modi, Princess Diana, Sans Serif, Shashi Tharoor, Sunanda Pushkar, The Indian Express, The Telegraph, The Times of India
13 April 2010 at 9:42 pm
He who twitters a lot gets twittered, twit for twat!
13 April 2010 at 9:52 pm
Superb……There’s something really wrong with this guy…
13 April 2010 at 9:58 pm
superb!! — churumuri, you rock. i can’t stop guffawing.
13 April 2010 at 10:06 pm
EPIC
13 April 2010 at 10:07 pm
churumuri…. thats an excellent post!!!! really creative and factual….
13 April 2010 at 10:21 pm
low-neck blouse and Tharoor’s arm around her.
Sooooo… Keralastic.
No wonder marwadi Modi having gone mad on Kashmir kanya.
Mohan Lal was tricked to leave the scene sometime back if I am not wrong.
Globalisation can only be done by Americans :)
13 April 2010 at 11:25 pm
Excellent post churumuri … lot of Congress folks including our SMK will be rubbing their hands in glee at this. But BJP should stay away from this and try not to make a fool of itself.
13 April 2010 at 11:37 pm
Haha…that’s hilarious. Will he tweet hsi resignation letter soon to Sonia?
14 April 2010 at 2:20 am
Great Churumuri.
We love you.
I like this example of globalization better than one given by Row Bahadur.
Diana rode S-280 a Mercedes Benz model. This has M104 engine and most likely it is German made(later MB licensed this to Korea) and not Dutch..
Also other things may not be correct ; like it was French doctors who treated her first not American. Hm. Brazilian medicines too may be far fetched..
Tarur seems to be following the tradition of that HRD minster who announced in parliament that NASA was filled with Indians!!!.
14 April 2010 at 7:28 am
hilarious…by the way today a Tharoor aide has called Modi a drug peddler….the skeletons cometh out of the closets…
14 April 2010 at 8:18 am
Absolutely one of the best satirical pieces that Churumuri has done.
It is a shame that Tharoor did not succeed in his bid to become the maestro of the U.N. Imagine the fun he might have embarrassing that do nothing organisation (maybe, just maybe, except in the case of the UNICEF).
Just how is all this wealth produced?
14 April 2010 at 8:49 am
wow…….this is just as awesome as the thothapuri mavinakayi churmuri i had yesterday……
14 April 2010 at 8:55 am
Why dont you also add “propped up by an Italian lady when he was kicked out of UN, and given a seat by Congress party that has amassed wealth in Swiss Banks, currently in the process of getting a divorce from a Canadian lady, having made a home in 5 star hotels owned by Americans………………………….”
14 April 2010 at 10:19 am
Bravo Churumuri!
That was hilarious!
14 April 2010 at 10:59 am
This is not a first for Mr Tharoor check this out http://www.unforum.com/UNinsiderMay07.htm
14 April 2010 at 11:05 am
Hillarious! Wonder if Tharoor will use that in his next speech!
;-)
14 April 2010 at 11:17 am
Supurb type-in-tweet
14 April 2010 at 11:18 am
Good one!!! :)
14 April 2010 at 11:31 am
Mona’s comment (the link to the UNForum site) was revealing. Watch this guy, he would land himself in more trouble; seems to have a penchant for it.
14 April 2010 at 11:53 am
It was a ‘pun’gent pun at its best and spicy like ‘churmuri’. Post more such commentary.
14 April 2010 at 11:57 am
Congress and their deadly chelas!! God bless us!
14 April 2010 at 12:14 pm
Considering the fact that even after so many gaffes , Shashi Tharoor hasn’t been sacked, it must be said that he is the most powerful minister of the UPA. Is it because he is privy to some secrets of the first family w.r.t Swiss accounts, Quattrochi, Volcker Oil-for-food scam? Only that can explain his still continuing as a minister.
14 April 2010 at 1:25 pm
Excellent! Churumuri has indeed outdone itself.
The guy has good looks, good resume and charm. To top all these he is a Mantri in Bharat Sarkar now! So getting pretty women is a walk in the park for him I guess. Ofc he also has a penchant to taste his own feet or tweet frequently:)
Having said that I wouldn’t really care if all these side-shows remain just side-shows and don’t affect his work at hand as the minister and an MP. Also as long as he doesn’t misuse his clout and position in amassing money on the sly for himself or his candy/candies on the arm.
14 April 2010 at 1:32 pm
:) :)
On serious note :
It seems Shashi Tharoor got death threats from D gang. Does it mean D gang has made a backdoor entry into IPL? Why should the ownership of a franchise be kept secret? What is the guarantee that underworld has no stake in any of the franchises considering that IPL has become a big cash cow. Fans have every right to know who owns the team.
It looks like ministers have become brokers for big business houses -
http://www.business-standard.com/india/news/of-intriguearm-twisting-in-high-places/391883/
What does Sonia Gandhi have to say about all this?
14 April 2010 at 2:20 pm
heheh good one churumuri but what is puzzling to me is how does a 4% stake in upstart IPL team can have valuation of 70-100 crores?
Why doesnt anyone in the media care about getting numbers right?
Man U is valued at $1.5 billion (even that is a stretch). And Kochi IPL team is worth $0.5 billion? I would put Ms. Pushkar’s 4% pull equity in 7-10 crore band.
14 April 2010 at 4:15 pm
Please cover this, blow by blow and tweet by tweet. More fun than any IPL game.
14 April 2010 at 8:48 pm
Well, Shahsi Tharoor did say some things which needed to be said- the sexist attitude of South Indians especially of Kerala which always assumes that any woman who got to any high post got it by granting sexual favors. Yet the first woman High Court Justice, many women IPS and IAS officers etc are from Kerala.
Again, the world of politics has its code just like the code among thieves. Shashi Tharoor has not yet got the hang of it. No big loss! He can write a best seller based on his experience.
Anyway I do wish he would continue to be in Indian Politics and prove his mettle. If he is really interested in serving the country (Minister means one who ministers not rules), then he would need to sacrifice a lot. If he is in only for power, he will soon be out. Too early to judge.
14 April 2010 at 11:31 pm
susan eapen,
In Sunanda’s case it seems probable that a woman has got to a high post (actually won a bumper lottery in he form of IPL team stake in this case), by granting sexual favors to Shashi Tharoor. I would hate if this were true, but the facts all seem to point to this.
15 April 2010 at 9:24 am
A very good one.
15 April 2010 at 10:35 am
It is Aruna’s numbers that don’t add up. 4% of 0.5 Bil = 20 Million $ which converted at the current rate translates to around 90 Crores.
15 April 2010 at 4:14 pm
This is a real INFOTINMENT. Thanks to chrumuri.
nice post.
15 April 2010 at 6:28 pm
Lo Mr. Nova nova,
before correcting my numbers, please chk what I have written.
How and who the fuck valued Kochi IPL at $0.5 billion?
15 April 2010 at 8:37 pm
The argument that Tharoor is hanging on for dear life is that he has not used his office for personal gain. Well it is Sunanda push-kar that stands to gain – for now, ofcourse it will be different when she becomes Biwi No 3. What kind of mentoring has he been providing anyway – when he is talking directly to IPL on behalf of his paramour that is not mentoring.His smooth talking and charming looks might help in media but his carefully constructed PR image has a few dents now.
Mr Tharoor has a history of weakness for the fairer sex and it is clouding his judgement(see my earlier post), not the squeaky clean image of a diplomat but more and more taking on the hues of true IPL -Indian Politician’s Life. After all it is seems to be the order of the day to cheat on one’s spouse and indulge in numerous dalliances. He might get away with it on the legal aspect but on the moral he will not. The score Shashi and sunanda 3 not out!!
17 April 2010 at 3:42 pm
[...] Considering the fact that even after so many gaffes , Shashi Tharoor hasn’t been sacked, it must be said that he is the most powerful minister of the UPA. Is it because he is privy to some secrets of the first family w.r.t Swiss … [view original] [...]
18 April 2010 at 10:12 pm
@Aruna,
You please “chk” the media reports. They paid $330 mil for it now. even at the current price it comes to around the said number only.
18 April 2010 at 11:26 pm
Howzatt!!!
19 April 2010 at 5:32 pm
Why can’t u call a howzaat on ur Reddy brothers who have been doing a lot more in ur own backyard in Karnatak… Go get a life guys!!
19 April 2010 at 10:06 pm
Its not just Reddy brothers. The malaise afflicts the mining industry in general, be it Bellary, Godavari, Jharkand or Meghalaya.
19 April 2010 at 10:59 pm
Anxiously waiting to call “howzaat” on Lalit Modi of Indian Paisamaking League!!!!
21 April 2010 at 5:45 pm
twitter people are goin crazy in happiness ….free publicity ….everyone will now exert more brains to undrstand twitter n bcm a part. Rest have u guys heard preach what you practice ….he actualy has alvz practiced and so is practising…this guy ahs alvz given us awesome articles changed are mindsets made us focus on wt bad hapening around us n nw its our chance to giv him smthing wt has lalit givn us lifeless IPL fake excitmeny money launderer…. i stil believe he wudnt hv secured..infact he wud hv secured his relationship b nt thru bad means
6 May 2010 at 8:58 pm
@ Murthy saaaar! This is very very very Kannadistic for me hehehe :-)
http://churumuri.wordpress.com/2010/05/04/and-the-milk-man-is-pure-positive-and-virtuous/
23 August 2010 at 12:58 am
Sunanda, Tharoor just friends, says her father
http://indiatoday.intoday.in/site/Story/92838/India/Sunanda,+Tharoor+just+friends,+says+her+father.html
I am not a proxy for Tharoor: Sunanda
http://cricket.rediff.com/report/2010/apr/14/sunanda-pushkar-not-a-proxy-for-tharoor.htm
and the ending: Shashi Tharoor weds Sunanda Pushkar
http://www.indiatimes.com/shashi-tharoor-weds-sunanda-pushkar/a-malayali-wedding/photostory/6391972.cms