Please fill in and send us your entries before the due date mentioned below. If you miss the deadline, no problem; send it before the next due date.
Prizes are indicated at bottom. An empowered group of ministers (EGoM) headed by Sri S. Jaipal Reddy if he is still in charge till then that is, will announce and distribute the prizes.
Your time begins now (or then):
Question 1: In your opinion, who is the biggest villain of the Commonwealth Games 2010?
a. Mani Shankar Aiyar
b. Suresh Kalmadi
c. Manohar Singh Gill
d. Sheila Dixit
e. All of the above, plus Dr. Manmohan Singh, Sonia Gandhi, Rahul Gandhi
Question 2: Which of the following presents the biggest threat for participants in Delhi CWG?
a) Falling roofs
b) Collapsing beds
c) Dengue, malaria, gastroenteritis
d) Dogs on beds
e) Leaky toilets
f) Waterlogging in bedrooms
g) Mudslide on running tracks
h) Filth, muck in games’ village
i) Politicians, bureaucrats
Question 3: How many kilometres of toilet paper have been imported by the organising committee for the games?
a) 10 km
b) 100 km
c) 1,000 km
d) None at all. Yamuna water is there everywhere
Question 4: Who should take the oath on ‘spirit of fair play’ before the games?
a) Queen of England for starting the fiasco with the ‘Baton Relay’ function.
b) Suresh Kalmadi
c) Lalit Bhanot
d) M.S. Gill
Question 5: Who will be the chairman of the organising committee for the Olympics Games to be hosted by India?
a) Suresh Kalmadi
b) Kalmadi’s son
c) Kalmadi’s daughter
d) Anyone else?
Question 6: Who will be the athlete of the games?
b) A.R. Rehman
c) Arnab Goswami of Times Now
d) Athletes who manage to reach the venues
Question 7: Who should get the ‘Drutharashtra’ award for extraordinary vision, conceptualisation and implementation of CWG Delhi?
a) Suresh Kalmadi
b) Mike Fennel and Mike Hooper
c) Mani Shankar Aiyar for ditching the Games
d) Manmohan Singh
Question 8: Who exactly is responsible for the mess that is CWG- Delhi?
a) Indian Olympic Committee
b) Commonwealth Games organising commitee
c) Central public works department
d) Delhi Development Authority
e) Centre government
f) Delhi State government
g) Both governments
h) All of them
Question 9: After the Games what do we do with Kalmadi?
a) Honour him with Bharat Ratna’
b) Hang him from a roof which doesn’t collapse
c) Make him president for hosting Olympics Games
d) Make him deputy chairman of planning commission
e) I have my own private plans
Question 10: Which movie title best sums up CWG 2010–Delhi?
a) Monsoon Wedding
c) Any Ramgopal Varma movie
d) Chori Chori
e) Chupke Chupke
Deadline for submission of entries: Just before opening ceremony of Olympic Games hosted by India.
Prizes: I Prize: Honorary menbership of IOC + 100 strips of paracetamol to fight dengue
II Prize: chairman of cleaning committee + 100 rolls of imported toilet paper
III Prize: drug inspector to test athletes for doping + 100 inhalers
Cartoon: courtesy E.P. Unny/ The Indian Express
Tags: Arnab Goswami, Churumuri, Commonwealth Games, CWG, Lalit Fucking Bhanot, M.S. Gill, Mani Shankar Aiyar, Manmohan Singh, Rahul Gandhi, Ramgopal Varma, Sans Serif, Sheila Dixit, Sonia Gandhi, Suresh Kalmadi